Public Speaking

I’ve done a fair share of public speaking. I mean, I’m no expert… but something tells me the public speaking experts aren’t really experts at all. Seeing as Public speaking in one of the most feared things in the world, I figured I’d attempt to help some people with it.

First off, If you’re scared of standing in front of a large crowd of people and speaking, you’re normal. If you aren’t, you’re not normal. It’s that simple. The fear or stress you get WILL NOT go away. Some people will say that with time, you’ll become less nervous, or less anxious. That’s not really true. I mean, remember when you liked some girl(or guy) and you wanted to ask her out. You were pretty nervous… the more people you ask out isn’t going to make you less nervous when asking this particular girl out. What it may do is better prepare you for the unknown.

What is the unknown in public speaking? Your performance and the audience reaction. Let’s go over the one you have the most control over first.

Your Performance

What if I screw up? What if I miss a part? What if I say something wrong? The only thing here that’s going to hurt you is yourself. Let’s tackle nerves.

Nerves:

1. Prepare. Simply put, the more prepared you are for a particular speech, the less nervous you’ll be. Winging a speech may involve less work, than weeks of preparation… but i guarantee it’ll make you more nervous. However, keep in mind this chart:
2. Everyone has them, and generally feels the same way when they hit the stage. You have it no harder than the last fellow. You’re no more special than that dude.
3. Everyone has their own way of calming themselves. They’re called pacifiers, and right away you can probably think of how a baby calms down. Adult examples includes biting nails, biting lips, rubbing your neck, rubbing your chest, cracking knuckles, etc. How to best handle nerves?
   1. Notice them. Find your pacifier. When I am nervous and stressed I tend to bite my inner lip.
   2. Assess them. Take a step back from your situation and look at why you are nervous. Find specifics. Are you nervous about computer technology? Are you nervous about the area you’ll be talking from.
   3. Take initiative, take action. You are priority number one! Do not ever feel like you are being a pain, when you are trying to make things go painlessly. If you are nervous about the computer tech, go through it once or twice, get confirmation that it works. Double check. If you don’t like the area you’re talking from, change it. Offer suggestions, be the squeaky wheel that gets the oil. If the expert disagrees, have them explain it in detail.
   4. You should feel calmer. But realize that you’ll still be nervous for no real reason now. Welcome to humanity… This you’ll just have to deal with.
4. No one is confident. Remember this always, some people are just better at hiding nerves. Practice hiding yours and you’ll have people people say you’re a confident person! What suckers right? Wrong. They just don’t know the secret to confidence. Don’t confuse confidence with stupidity though… and remember to not ignore your nerves. They are there to tell you something. Use them as fuel to help you prepare.
5. Accept your fate. It’s a motto that fails miserably in emergency situations, but a general hopeless feeling in high stress situations is known to give people a rush of natural chemicals that can help you cope with the evident future. Instead of churning over your notes, sit back and clear your head. Spa style. You’re prepared as you’re going to be, 10 minutes of high intensity reviewing will most likely make you more upset.

Your Performance:

1.    First and most importantly, know your stuff. If you’re making a technical speech, know what you’re talking about. If it’s a heartfelt speech, know your own emotions. I’ll write another post about speech writing soon…

2.    Sound like you know your stuff. If I presented a speech to a bunch of people about Quantum Physics I would sound quite different than if I talked about how I made this site. There are several things that I notice between an expert speaker and a speaker. (notice an expert speaker and not just an expert… this is how con-men work)

a.    Uhms and Ahhs. Possibly the biggest giveaway of a poor speaker. People spend hundreds of dollars in training to get rid of this simple flaw. When people are having a conversation, there is a queue that is created. The person speaking has the floor, while the others wait their turn. Once the speaker shuts up, the next person is able to voice their opinion. In the informal rules of conversation no one is there to designate when someone has stopped talking. So people tend to go when they get the chance. I think this is where we’ve developed our uhm and ahh tendency. It’s our way of holding our spot as speaker while we gather our thoughts. Since you are the only speaker there is no need for any uhms and ahhs. That being said, it is almost guaranteed you’ll say them. DON’T! They make you sound unsure, and unconfident. The best thing to do is to replace them with silence. Believe me this will be the hardest thing to do. It will sound really awkward to you, but to everyone else it will sound like a pause, or a period of time to let your points sink into the audience. Meanwhile you can catch up with yourself and move on to your next point. Please erase them. And the best way to do that is to be conscious of them every time you say it. Make them become a pet peeve.

b.    Speaking Speed. There is a golden pace of speech when it comes to speaking. To slow and you sound like a big dumb construction worker, too fast and you sound like a bumbling nerd. Slightly slower than conversational speed is best. Remember that some people may have a hard time hearing you. Remember you can change the speed of your words. For parts that are important, slow it down. For parts more common knowledge, speed it up. Keep this in mind. Generally the faster people talk about a particular topic, the more they know it. To make it seem like you know something better than you do, talk slightly faster. However watch out… if you know your speech like the back of your hand, you may blaze through it. Slower is generally better

3.    Look like you know your stuff. Dress appropriately. Stand with good posture, and eliminate unneeded movement. That last part may be taken wrong… you can move, but do so purposely. You can pace from one side to the other to address the audience, but pacing in general isn’t a great thing. Repeated unneeded movement makes you look awkward and nervous. Constantly shifting your weight or brushing your hair out of your face is distracting. Please don’t do it. There are some thing we do out of habit, like the uhms and ahs. Everyone is slightly different… so find what you do when speaking and don’t do it. You may think it’s no big deal, and you’re right, it may not be, but imagine the president or first lady doing the same thing. You should find it hard to imagine, and if you can… you might find it funny to see. That’s because it looks far better NOT to. As a side note to this part… by all means talk with your hands.

4.    Address the audience. Look up and out AT THE PEOPLE. I’ve seen people who just gaze out while the talk and perform a sweeping motion like a gun turret on auto. Find some sections of people and talk to those people. Respond to their responses. You’re in a conversation with them… so if they nod, or smile or react in some way, you’re good, now move to the next section. Please don’t look at your speech/feet.

Audience Reaction

This is something you really can’t control. But you can tailor the speech for them.

1.    First know your audience. I wouldn’t rant about the harmonization of provincial and federal taxes to grade eights, because they won’t care. And even if they’re listening… they’re just being polite. I could however, talk to them about Miley Cyrus and all the ears would be pointed my way. The easiest thing to do is to tell them what they want to hear. Look at politicians as an example. They constantly get caught in a web of their own lies because it’s easier to tell people what they want to hear.

2.    Break what the audience wants/what you want to tell the audience into two or three things. If I was writing a graduation speech I would break it down into the fun they’ve had, the fun they’re going to have, and potential of their future. There will be people that want it to be funny, there will be people that will want it to be serious, and there are people who want it to be reflective and sad. Who do you please? That’s up to you, but remember audience reaction will depend on it. Can you please everyone? Maybe! You can try. It’s best to please the majorities and you should be fine.

3.    Get the reaction you want. I’ve used the word “please” because most people are scared someone won’t like their speech. But I want you to use that as a place holder for the emotion you want to place on the audience. If you want to provoke thought, or encourage change, you probably won’t be pleasing anyone. But if that’s the goal of your speech then you’re doing the right thing.

Conclusion

It’s like asking that girl on a date. The best thing for you to do is focus on the things you can control. Like are you groomed? or Do you smell nice? Then close your eyes and hope for the best. You’ve done all that you can do so there’s no point in worrying now. Can you help yourself out further? Sure! If the girl likes a particular movie, then you can ask her on a date to that movie, or tickets to her favourite band. It depends if you want to get that yes reaction or not.

Lastly, remember Public Speaking isn’t an exact science, and if it was I wouldn’t be that particular scientist. If something works for you use it, if it doesn’t don’t use it. If you have a tip or disagree with something here, send me an email or post in the comments and I’ll add to it.

If you need help with your speech writing, stay tuned for my article on writing speeches.